You would think that after all I've been through, all that I've seen, I've endured, persevered through, and made up my mind about... You would think that this moment would be something I pushed through with great might and strength!
Well I'm in my feelings. I thought of my blog, the encouragement of random people deriving from my everyday experiences, and I smiled. I'm inspired when I inspire.
It makes me happy. It gives me peace and it reminds me that I'm worth something. I am of value. I am a tree.
I want you all to be encouraged as I encourage myself. We are shaken, tossed about, thrown away, made to think we are less than, and we are torn down but only, ONLY, to be built back up again. Only to be reconfigured into something greater.
Think of it as a computer, downloading updates, being reconfigured, made to manifest better actions than before. We are becoming greater through our struggles.
We must learn, or take that update.
I think of how many times my computer says "installing updates", "postpone or shut down".
Depending on what I'm doing at the moment I hardly ever shut down when the update is ready. I wait until I'm ready.
I never know the validity of that update though. I never know what it's going to help my computer do.
We never know what a trial will do for us. We always see it as a upset in our plans. We never grab hold of the trial and fly with it. We fight against it often times until we are shut down, until we can postpone no longer.
What I'm going through at this present moment is huge in my eyes, but with the guidance of Spirit I think it's not as huge as I think it is. My commitment is crucial. I see light at the end of the tunnel but when the trial becomes tough I want to leave. I have to fight that feeling to give up. It's quite easy. It has it's consequences to though. We have to think of the greatness that comes from enduring metamorphosis. We have to think about what our end will look like.
We have to think of how it will feel to have fought and won!
We also may need to know what it feels like to have fought for something and lose.
Either way, we are getting updated.
Shutting down isn't bad. It's like sitting still long enough, thinking through it long enough, and listening long enough to get the lesson out of situation.
Sometimes people hate to hear something bad about themselves, as if it's the end of the world. We deny our mishaps, and sins. We pretend it's everybody else that needs updating and not us.
Everybody else needs to have "several seats" but not us.
But you sin, I sin. You make wrong choices that hurt people. I do too. You give up on something that you have control over. I have too. It doesn't make you any less of a person.
Stand up anyway and push on through and see what the end will be.
I listened to an Alicia Keys song today, Why am I here?
Great song.
It brought tears to my eyes. I've asked myself that question on lowly days like today.
It's a reminder that I'm here for you.
With all the things going on in the world, it can't only be about my struggle. It's about the everyone's struggle, hurt, and pain.
You can't believe that you are the only one. Sometimes people persevere through things for others, to show them that you can do it too.
I remember Tina Campbell and her journey through adultery played out before the media. She was strong. Some people thought she was a fool. I saw redemption and mercy in rare form. I saw the ability to see that people are able to choose out of their brokenness and in return hurt someone else. It doesn't mean that you abandon them.
Maybe that's why we don't admit our mistakes, we are afraid of being abandoned.
Of course her husband had to show and prove his faithfulness but what I'm getting at here is the love for yourself and for others. If you can love yourself through, love others through it, I think it'll make it easier for you to get through whatever you may be facing that day.
No one is perfect. Being perfect is not requirement for success. You can have success, of course you'll have to take those updates and quit putting them off, but ask yourself who do you know that is perfect in every way?
God please stand up! Right....
Today I'm loving myself in spite of people, circumstances, and my ability to downgrade myself when God is clearly trying to give me some updates.
Be blessed my butterflies!
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